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Old Music and New Problems

June 3, 2012

Today has actually been a really good day so far. I guess before I can explain today, I gotta explain that me and Danielle moved out of our rent’s house in January. It was a few weeks after my brief (though it seemed a lifetime to me) hospital stay. Now we’re living with some friends about 2 hours from where my parent’s house is. Even though things haven’t been like rainbows and unicorns, I am way happier here than when I was at home.

Anyway, today I deposited a check and then helped Mrs. Gibbs (the mom of the family we’re living with) plant a bunch of flowers and even a tomato plant. It was fun. I really like plants and gardening, though I do dislike bees a lot. There was one that kept flying around us as we were potting the plants. I succeeded in not freaking out. Yay me haha.

After that, I finished reading “The Catcher In The Rye”. Did you know that it’s Gerard Way’s favorite book and Winona Ryder’s? I watched “Heathers” recently, and “Reality Bites”. I think I’ve become a Winona Ryder fan. I just like her acting style. I’m still in the middle of “Girl, Interrupted” (which I’ve seen before, but not in years). I really liked “The Catcher In The Rye”.  It’s like an ordinary story, no big plot twists or tense moments or anything. But I enjoyed it. The main character was really likable and relatable for me.

Now I’m doing math on Khan Academy and listening to my “work” playlist on Grooveshark. I never put any effort in ordering the songs cause I always put the playlist on shuffle. Anyway, if you wanna check it out, here’s the link. It’s so nice to listen to music again. Even though I listen to music every time I go running, it’s more indie than hard rock or metal. I’ve missed my “work” playlist. Oh also, I’ve been really into Bob Dylan lately. Again. I discovered this song a couple months back, and it ranks right up there with “Don’t Think Twice, It’s Alright” for me. His music is so thoughtful. I love it.

You may notice that I haven’t posted any pictures yet. That’s cause I haven’t felt very photogenic or like taking pictures lately. Maybe my next post will.


A New Chapter

May 29, 2012

I haven’t written on here in a long time. Alot has happened since June 2011. To summarize,  I have:

1. Been in the hospital for a while
2. Started a medication
3. Started counseling
4. Moved out of my parents house and in with some friends
5. Enrolled in the local community college
6. Started applying for scholarships
7. Made new friends
8. Quit my job
9. Started going to church regularly

As you can see, I’ve been pretty busy. Maybe I’ll write out a fuller version sometime. Anyway, today I have been calling different stores about my job application (so far so good) and watching Naruto. I have really missed this show. I’m way behind, which I’m happy about cause that means I have a lot of episodes to watch. I should also start on two scholarship essays (they’re due soon >_<). Anyway, you can expect to see more frequent postings.

Also, I have been pretty active on my tumblr:

More later.

Joel Burns tells gay teens “it gets better”

June 21, 2011

This 12 minutes long. Please take those 12 minutes to listen, regardless of your political or spiritual views on homosexuality. It’s worth listening to.

June 5, 2011

As I’m going through this difficult time, (it’s complicated) I have been listening to copious amounts of rock and some heavy metal.  My favorite songs to listen to over and over again are:

Odd One by Sick Puppies

One-X by Three Days Grace

Evil Angel by Breaking Benjamin

Until The End by Breaking Benjamin

Cloudy Now by Blackfield

Knives and Pens by Black Veil Brides

Perfect Weapon by Black Veil Brides

Fallen Angels by Black Veil Brides

End Of The World by Blackfield

Dear God by Avenged Sevenfold

Dear Agony by Breaking Benjamin

I’ve also been listening to my break up mix again. I haven’t listened to it in a while, but it seems it’s needed again. I don’t know why I thought I could be completely over 2 years of feelings in just 5 months. Stupid. Anyway, I haven’t posted clothes in a while, so here’s some stuff I’m dying to buy:

Always dying for some Dr Marten’s. I still don’t have a pair 😦

Kinda look like the Gryffindor symbol.

I like how complicated these are. I’ve wanted armwarmers like these for a while.

I want a watch SO BAD!! You know why? Because, when they ask you to turn off your electrical devices, (cell phone, Ipod, etc.)  I have NO WAY TO TELL THE TIME!!! It’s so annoying!!

I’m still after the perfect summer dress..

..and the perfect romper

I like the color of this dress. I keep trying to find a skirt that I could wear with T-shirts. I think this one would work.

BEST. T-SHIRT. EVER!! A must have

Hahahahahahaha definitely second best T-shirt

I hope everyone else is enjoying their weekend. Mine’s….interesting…

Life moves on..

Memorial Day

May 30, 2011

Jeans – Pacsun
Tanks – Target
“Love” Racerback – Forever 21
Shoes – Payless
Hoodie – Forever 21

Hahaha still kinda shy about doing this. But eh, I’ll get better. I hope you’re all having a great Memorial day! (or just regular day if you’re outside the U.S.) My day hasn’t really started yet. I worked out this morning and then took a shower. That’s about it. I’m going to my aunt’s house later today for a barbeque, so that’s good.


I finally got my bar back! (please excuse the hair conditioner; I have to leave a lot in for my curls =) I didn’t have it for a while because it started cutting into my ear arch thing >_<. After it healed a while, the piercer dude bent a bar for me so it won’t touch my arch anymore. I’m so happy!

Take 1

May 30, 2011

Jeans – Delia’s
T-Shirt – Hot Topic
Hoodie – Target
Converse – bday gift
Rings – various stores

And there you have it! My first attempt at a clothing post. The pics are that great quality, but hey; it’s my first attempt! And I never said I was good at photography. Anyway, hopefully I’ll get up the guts to do this regularly.

My Wall

May 29, 2011

I love my wall of pictures. It’s not really like any of my friends’ walls that I’ve seen. Instead of ripping things out of magazines and taking photos of stuff, I print out pics from the web of stuff I like and paste it on my wall. Maybe people do that, I’m not really sure. But I love it. I love adding new stuff to it.

Speaking of which, my taste in dudes has really changed in the last few months. For those of you who don’t know, these are pics of Joseph Gordon Levitt and Laurence Fox. I’ve noticed that the dudes I’m attracted to now are like skinny and gangly and most of them are nerds. I think I’m really into nerds now! (not the JGL or Laurence Fox are nerds, btw). When I say nerd, I mean guys like this:

And this:

And this:

But NOT this (below):

Or this:

(Although this dude is pretty cool)

Also, I mean “nerd” in the nicest way possible. I’m starting to like dudes who are really intelligent; guys who like nonpopular video games, and have odd hobbies like knitting. In my mind there are two types of “nerds”:

The cool nerd (urban dictionary):  Someone who has interest in anything with educational value, electronics, RPGs, Sci-fi (books, movies etc), sex, Anime, Music (the kind that can be well-known ie: Radiohead, Voltaire, The Smashing Pumpkins, The Dandy Warhols, The Beatles etc.. or underground ie: Noise band music, Hip Hop, etc..), Taking electronic things apart and tweaking/modifying them, Video Games, May like sports, Play an instrument like guitar, drums, violin etc, watches popular shows to educational shows, has a fair amount of friends they are close to, socially well adjusted, knows how to have fun not only in a nerdy but in a cool way too.

The real nerd (urban dictionary): An ‘individual’, i.e. a person who does not conform to society’s beliefs that all people should follow trends and do what their peers do. Often highly intelligent but socially rejected because of their obesssion with a given subject, usually computers. A person who is intensely interested in a particular hobby or topic.

So yeah; I’m kind of more interested in thin, gangly dudes and nerds. If I meet a thin, gangly nerd, I’ll probably fall in love (P.S. obviously, when it comes down to it, it depends on the person). I think this change in preference has come from my recent openness to being myself. If I were to label myself I’d say I was a dumb nerd (maybe that’s the definition of geek?). Why am I a dumb nerd? Because I love, but don’t know much about:

-Video games
-ThunderCats (and other 80s cartoons)
-Math & Science
-Star Wars (the original 3)
-Iron Man (the movie! See? A real nerd would love the original cartoon)
-Manga and Anime
-Classic literature (mostly 1800s Russian novels)
-British mystery series (I’ve probably seen all of them)
-Rock and some heavy metal (idk if that’s really a nerd thing, but I put it down because I love rock and heavy metal, but don’t ask me for facts about the bands!)
-SciFi movies and books (like Ender’s Game)

So there you have it! Since I’ve started being myself  more, I’ve realized how not-cool-nerdy I am. And I love it!